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Friday, November 30, 2007, 10:06 PM
can i erase this week from my lifetime history?
i guess it must have been the worse week in my 1 and a half year of sch life? the whole undivided tension, awkwardness, heated squabbles. major turn off. && it doesn't help when i feel ignored. why do guys have such big ego when it comes to relationships? aren't relationships supposed to be the whole, 'give and take' thing. i dun get it, seriously. i am hurt about everything u said, i am irritated with everything u said. i am just gonna let it go. let me rephrase here, i'll try to let it go. something that i can't just let go. friends with benefits. it scares me. there's a whole new consciousness about the people ard us. who can we trust and who can we not? or rather not all but just some rotten apples among us. to put ourselves in ur shoes. it maybe relevant to any other situation but not this. for u have put urself into this. u damaged ur reputation. and pulled down the status of another. how fair can it be that we put ourselves in ur shoes? if u're smart enough. u'll understand. u'll repent. && maybe. i guess u might change. the other situations. the one with certain ones involved. i am running out of words to bring the points across. hurt.pissed.irritated. a whole lot of mixed emotions that is let out loose. |
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Thursday, November 29, 2007, 9:11 PM
everything that's happening ard me.
it's the whole. expected out the unexpected kinda stuff. the least expected things pop up from no where and leaves a huge mark in me. && now, a friend of mine. though we weren't close at all. it's troubling me. why is that most of my friends have to be gone in this way? the whole tortured kind of ending. they dun deserve this one bit. i was totally taken aback when kalai mentioned it. && funny much? the world's totally small, everyone is linked somehow. in a way or another. i pray that u'll rest peace. the undivided awkwardness today affected ma mood. but i guess it was restored towards the end of the day. vanessa was such a sweetie pie today. her motherly kinda instinct was overly generated today. && yesh, she can be a good mummy. ask me why, if she can tame nesha and make her finish her meal. :p definitely nessa can be a good mummy to any kid in any corner of the earth. the trip back with her, was lovely. the whole girl talk. i enjoyed it. the lesson today was totally killing me, i cud have cried out coz of boredom. and it caused me to fiddle ard with the beaded string thingy used to ctrl the length of the blinds. && unintentionally i was swinging it ard, and it landed on the faci's head. damn, it was hilarious. but i freaked out. he was practically giving me tad watch out look. ahahhaha. but, it was superr funny. i dun understand why u're still angry with me? i din do anything wrong. ur ego's getting way bigger each time. it's time u controlled it. for the greater good. pp is over. now it's ut. shit. |
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Wednesday, November 28, 2007, 10:47 PM
life's the best when u have the nicest clique of frens ard you, and you are able to be urself with them.
i loved today. let's do it more often. PP was awesome. it went perfectly fine, i think i did a good job. one of the faci said, my poster looked professional. ahaha. thaNks to Fazli. without him, the poster wud have been crap, seriously. there's applied chem ut on friday. i haven studied yet. and i aint able to either. there's loads of distractions ard me. nesha's kiss. we succeeded to traumatize chicken. hehe. &&................................... heated tensions.the need of freedom. |
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, 10:47 AM
a few more hours to PP Presentation.
i'm getting nervous by the min. hopefully like wad everyone said, it'll be easy peasy. this is the most relaxed lab session i have ever attended. && i love it loads. if all lab sessions are like this, i will never miss any lessons. during break, tweety came out wid this phrase which keeps on replaying in my mind. "Vanessa is the epitome of all retardation". how true eh?! eheheh. i agree i agree. |
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Tuesday, November 27, 2007, 10:44 AM
it doesn't help when u wanna stay in sch and he doesn't want u to.
it doesn't help when u try to explain and everything else goes wrong. it doesn't help when u feel like bursting into screams and tears and you can't. i guess i must have woke up on the wrong side of my bed. the weird dream i had just before the alarm clock woke me up, it's disturbing. i can't get over it. when i'm finally early, the traffic had to screw up and again, ended up late to class. and now YOU! haiz. the feeling of wanna be isolated from everything. |
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Monday, November 26, 2007, 11:02 PM
am so shagged wid the poster.
like finally am done, thanks to Fazli & Erica. they were the sweetest to help me out with poster. Thanks Guys. it was lovely working with ya'll. so fun. esp, when there were pests flying over the place, && Erica and i were literally screaming into Fazli's ears. i love ya'll! Ma Dad was back last nite, and he brought back home a heaven of chocolates. i am melting in chocolate. && he aso got me two tshirts from aus, cute ones. ah! i am special. i noe now. coz everyone else in the house only received one tshirt each, while i got two from ma daddy. &&&&&&& SUPER SHOCKING: daddy bought naren t-shirts too. i was super shocked. and i started glowing when he told me to pass it to naren. i made it super obvious man! Damn! am tireddd. now. tmr, i dun think i'd be going to sch. naren wanna spend some quality love wid me tmr. hehe. off tooo bed. |
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Sunday, November 25, 2007, 7:56 PM
PP Poster = DRAIN OUT BRAIN JUICES COMPLETELY.
it's a pointless Sunday. the whole day is dedicated for the poster. which turns to be mind-wrecking. it only makes the cells in the brain more strained. it does it doess. really. i wanna get done wid as soon as possible. && to those who wanna rub it in. coz their presentation's on the 5th Dec. while we're done with it. u guys are still mugging over it. muahahahahahaha *evil* DADDY'S RETURNING HOME TODAY. after one week. Yipppeeee!! |
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Saturday, November 24, 2007, 7:46 PM
a fun-filled day. quality family time spent in the absence of my daddy. totally fun. my brothers, mummy and I went Tampines mall around 1 in the noon. we went for a super heavy lunch at pizza hut.we ate till we felt like we were gonna burst anytime sec the next munch of pizza goes into our stomach. then we went for 'The Bee Movie'. it wasn't tad bad though. very cute. the way the bees moved and talked. ahaha. when i told Naren. the movie was nice and cute. he told me to go back to primary school. i was like WTH?! ahahahah then we were walking around Tampines Mall, i decided to do a manicure, my mum was like go ahead. so we head towards Century Square, and i did ma nails. a simple manicure though, no nail artwork done. my bros, on the other hand, spent $150 on two Playstation games. wonder why these games cost so blardy much?! then went down for a coffee break at Ya Kun Coffee Stall && back home! my maid is full of problems, and she's irritating the fuck out of ma mum. so annoying. i wonder why these maids love to irritate their employers with their problems!! ONE MORE DAY MA DADDY'S COMING BACK. |
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Friday, November 23, 2007, 9:25 PM
yippeeee. tmr's saturday!
OFFICIAL sleep-like a pig day. i am gonna sleep till the sun sets. to regain energy that i have lost. today. was such a pathetic day. i can't believe nesha, shanie & I were the only people in sch. the rest decided to aimlessly stay at home or roam around. such a dread. the lesson was. she was a nice faci, yet a draggy faci. i left class, after presenting. made ma way to naren's house. spent an hour or so, and came back home. am superr duperr tired. i need to slp like real soon. but am waiting for cupcakes to come online. i promised her i'll be online at nite. ma mum wanna send back ma brother's PSLE papers for re-checking. she feels that there must have been a mistake. i agree with her too. students who got: 2A's, B & C = get a aggregate of 226 my brother who got straight A's = got 224. unbelievable. monday, they are going back to school. Ma Dad's Coming Back This Sunday! ♥ am getting excited!! :D naren. ♥loves me ♥.he said.he does. :D |
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, 9:39 AM
it was tiring yet a lovely evening. yesterday.
i had a nice dinner. wid ma baby. && his friends. HaPPy Birthday, Sathish! :D hope u liked the card. ahaha. Naren looked awesome yesterday. really really awesome. to ma small cute eyes. got a lil tipsy after seeing him. :x a few shots that i forced him to take.  he loves me. he's ma teddybear. he made me gooo WOOOOOWWWW. he cut off ma face. kiss kiss. more kisses. what's wid the eyes. nice anyway. |
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Thursday, November 22, 2007, 2:27 PM
yesterday's story of ma life.
it couldn't have been any more than perfect. no words in the dictionary can describe yesterday. outing wid nesha. movie. mac breakfast. shopping!  it's only one quarter of the shopping... FANTASTIC!! the connection between me and her. it feels so special. she makes me feel loved at all point of time.  Ma Cupcakes. I Love Her.Classic moments that were captured...       while shopping, i bought naren a sweater. something that juz popped in front of ma eyes && i simply loved it. && it fit him perfectly. made him look like a big teddybear wrapped in wool. HE BOUGHT ME A BONIA WALLET TOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!! for ma birthday! it was the sweetest thing. i loved it. i love him for it! i'll post the picture of the wallet once i take it. yesterday couldn't have got any better. |
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Tuesday, November 20, 2007, 7:57 PM
bitchy.
crappy. childishly retarded. too many emotions were let loose today. from the bitchy morning to crappy afternoon to childishly retarded evening. randomly the mood changes with no notification. && when class ended. the laughing gas attacked nesha & me. we simply couldn't control our laughter, the cheekiness was expressed thru the giggles. lesson was pretty boring. or shud i say totally screwed. in the C.S way - i was dying across the room. i was. literally. reasons: = the faci brought in the dead aura! = the sch was being a total bitch by blocking msn - there's no life without msn! i miss naren. loads. i miss my daddy. come back soon. I'm counting down the days. |
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Monday, November 19, 2007, 9:11 PM
ARGHHH! ROAARRRRR! fuckin pissed!! |
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, 12:54 PM
a slight thought about ma studies makes me go totally insane.
it's time i better pick up from where i left. SEMESTER TWO - there's simply no motivation to even attend class. && it has greatly affected the grades. i think the reason is due to the change of classes each day. looking at the grades now, i won't be even able to step at the doorstep of any university. thus, i have made up ma mind!! i'm not gonna play ard anymore. && i'm supposed to motivate shaktHee. she's supposed to motivate me!! a lil ridiculous it might seem. but we've made up our mind to work hard. SHAKTHEE!! U BETTER MOTIVATE ME!! NOT DEMORALIZE!! |
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, 2:34 AM
 The Birthday Cake - From Fazli & Erica Big Big Smile!! Can't tell Ya How Happy I am!! Making A Wish! Cutting Cake Celebration! The Bestest of Friends I am Gifted to Have! Neva really expected ma Besties to pop at ma door around 9 in the night with a cake in their hands. The joy I felt, a thousand words wouldn't be able to express this happiness. I got so touchy and feely, I started tearing - tears of joys that is. Thank you Fazli and Erica - YOU GUYS MADE MA DAY!! I Love Ya'LL. LOADS LOADS MANY MANY!!! Ma Bestest Besties!! IT'S THE BEST BIRTHDAY I HAD! despite sitting at home the whole day!! THANK YOU FAZLI! THANK YOU ERICA! |
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Sunday, November 18, 2007, 6:05 PM
i think this b'day must have been the worse ever.
i'm feeling like crap. and ma stomach is adding to the problems. anytime, i might just faint.haiz. my daddy's out of town for the next one week. went to Australia for some business issues. i miss you daddy. i dun think i am in any condition to attend sch tomorrow. i doubt i will be able to survive the one hour journey to school. argh. irritated. |
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, 2:07 PM
 Happy Birthday to ME! Happy Birthday to ME!!
Happy Birthday to -haRuna-!! Happy Birthday to MYSELF!! finally i'm 18. thanks to everyone who have wished me, and reminded me about going CLUBBING with them. i promise, i will club with you guys soon. Love ya'll. Muacks to all! |
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Saturday, November 17, 2007, 6:04 PM
down wid fever of 38°C.
having a very bad throat infection. coughing real badly. argh. can't believe i have to go thru this during my birthday period. like finally am turning 18 tmr. Yipee!!! but sadly can't celebrate. && why is the party off? that was ma only hope to enjoy my special day. haiz. nvm, I'll go partying some other time, when i can. on Thursday Nite, i was going thru some real major crisis with Naren. to the extent, i told him i wanna leave him. but after a while, i realized. how dumb can i be to mention break over something which could have been solved over talking. my relationship was about to be ended over something which meant nothing. it all started over the net, most of the arguments we face starts over the msn. i dun think i wanna have any conversations with him over the net anymore, juz to save ourselves. then, we talked over it on the phone for about 2 hours, and things finally became fine. it amazes me, how i can screw up things, cry endlessly, and a few words that he mention make me regain my senses. i guess, that's why i'm the one who always starts all the probs and he's the one who always end it smoothly. i'm sorry darling, really am. i promise i won't repeat such mistakes again. i love you loads. i'll neva want to lose a gem like you. i only pray each day that you wouldn't leave me even if i wanted to. I LOVE YOU NARENDAREN!! then, on Friday, as a compensation to what happened on Thursday, he brought me out for a movie. i was supposed to attend UT after the movie, but by the time the movie ended, i was feeling too sick that i would have collapsed in the cinema. during the movie, i talked him into buying me Ben & Jerry's ice-cream despite he telling me NO all the way. i'm smart, ain't i? but the ice-cream made my cough worse, hehe. i can't resists the temptations of chocolate ice-creams i miss my honeys. can't wait to go back to sch. UT1 grades for Pharmacology: D (expected) UT1 grades for Reasoning Through the Ages: B+ (unexpected) ~ teddybear loves piggy. piggy loves teddybear.~ ~ in our world with endless of love ~ |
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Thursday, November 15, 2007, 8:31 PM
ma throat hurts. ma cough's getting worse by the min.
my head feels heavy. my body feels warmer than usual. so, it can be clearly concluded that i am gonna fall sick. i dun wanna fall sick. with a party to attend on Sunday. i'm more than ever prepared to party with ma ladies. all the grinding. if only Sherilyn would come, pls do tweety!?! && the wild imagination with CY in the middle, and all the hands over him, us grinding him into pulp. weird fantasies. kinky mental images. anyways. screwed up Pharmacology UT2. & got a D+ for MCB UT1. am surprised, i tot i would get a F or something. should i skip tmr? Naren wants to meet me.. should I skip the UT? am contemplating. ~ yenno yenno vali konjam kooduthey, ada kadhal ithu thaana ~ |
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Wednesday, November 14, 2007, 11:11 PM
  this feeling. it makes me go mad.grumpy.cranky.fucked up. i wanna scream into ur face! really i do!! |
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, 8:43 PM
the day started off rather fine - except for the rain that created the sleepy mood.
till lunch time, when some smart-ass girl ruined everything. is there anythin written on ma face - like "come, find trouble wid me"? damn, wad's wrong wid people these days..  that's for calling me a bitch, u asshole!thanKs to cupcakes, she saved me. «¨°¤°·hå®üñã·°¤°¨» says:those were nesha's savior sentences. HA! bitch. if i see u ard sch, i swear i'll kick ur flat ass off the ground! damn, i really wonder.. how come some people just grow physically and not mentally? how is that possible? ~~ CY cheated us today. he said he wud come. thus, i dragged maself out of bed, JUST FOR HIM. && he did this. HAIZ!! tad's fella ah..... i miss him though! && there's pharmaco UT tmr, haven't started studying. i don't think i will be though. |
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Tuesday, November 13, 2007, 10:58 PM
i think i have damaged too much of brain cells in the process called learning today.
the left side of ma head feels so heavy that i feel like gravity is acting upon it. ma teddy bear sent me a msg in the morning which almost made me drop of the chair. it was pathetic yet funny. "Ma baby forget me already. Yest al da gd times she had,she 4got. Haiz"he sent me such a cute sms because i din check on him in the morning. hehe. dun worry darlin, i won't ignore u ok. eheh. just a random discussion with cupcakes: CY made an impression in my mind, u noe, one of the rare guys that will NEVER fade away from you mind. He definitely won't fade away from ma mind. i realized. everyone have their dirty lil secrets. on the second thought, who doesn't eh?! :p 2 UTs comin' up this thursday, stressful. ~ sleepy sleepy ~ |
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, 2:06 PM
deduction for the day :
PHARMACOLOGY LAB SESSIONS SUCK BIG TYM. damages ma brain cells. ): |
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Monday, November 12, 2007, 11:37 PM
the day couldn't have been any better today.
i think i must have been the happiest girl in earth today. a perfect day, a perfect weather, a perfect couple. :D after so many weeks, finally i met ma man. the big bear hug that he gave me at the mrt station platform, it made me feel so loved. i guess that's the best part. u feel so loved when u see ur loved one after such a long time. we caught a new tamil movie at yishun. i shud say, the movie wasn't tad bad. kinda of different compared to all the other Vijay(one of the leading actors in the tamil film industry) movies. after watching the movie, which was 3-hr long, we went off to serangoon road, to have vegetarian lunch. naren was so sweet to have veg food because of me. i didn't tell him this then, but i really appreciated it. it may not have been a big issue, but it reflected how much he cared for me. .... that's all for how much i can tell about the day. :p there can be nothing better compared to being in the arms of your loved one. the feeling can't be described with words, it only can be felt. Naren, thanks so much for whatever u have done for me. i really really appreciate the love, care, concern, u shower on me. a thousands words can't express my thanks. i am grateful da, really i am. i love you baby. ~~~~ tmr, i will be back in sch. i promise i wun skip anymore classes. :D fuck, i think i lost ma couple ring. i better go ransack ma room to find it. haiz. i am so careless these days. **happy lil piggy running ard in joy** |
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Sunday, November 11, 2007, 8:02 PM
Like finally. School's opening tomorrow.
It's the day that I had been waiting for, but now, I don't feel like going back to school. I need a few more days to regain the energy that I have lost in this One week. This one week have been solely dedicated for ma late uncle. All the prayers that had to been done. I'm not complaining but it's really very exhausting. To travel from Woodlands to Bedok all the time. It's nothing new, it's juz like a normal trip to school and back home. Nevertheless, it drained me completely. Therefore,... Can I self-declare a few more days of holidays to recuperate my strength? I missed Sathish's Birthday. Haiz. I have such bad memory!! I'm so sorry da. Really slipped off ma mind. Happy Belated Birthday Dear. Muacks!! |
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Saturday, November 10, 2007, 11:27 PM
My red heart is blue, because I'm missing you. Every day, I think about you,and I imagine how great every hour, every minute, and every second would be if you were here with me. Every night, when I lie in bed, I dream that you're beside me, holding me close to you. If you were, I'd whisper in your ear, how much I love you. Since you came into my life nothing has been the same. I've experienced love to its fullest, and I've tasted a beauty that never ends, because you're where my happiness begins. I'm incomplete without you, and I'll never stop loving you. You're the world to me, in brilliant colors. You're my best friend, a favorite song that will never end. And together is where we should be. For I yearn that you'll walk through the door and take this heartache away.  I'm sorry baby if I really made u mad. Honestly, my marbles are totally screwed without seeing you. I have even lost count of the number of days we haven't seen each other. It maybe a few weeks, but it feels like ages. Pls come soon, to repair my marbles..
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, 7:06 PM
the mood today is so crabby.
i feel like lazing in bed all day long. which i know it's not possible. it's a Saturday. an official 'sleep like a pig-day' but i had to wake up at 645 in the morning to go all the way to lavender to collect ma new passport. ma face looks extremely horrible in the passport. can i change it pls?!? when i got back home.. i slept from 12 to 4. and thanKs to ma mummy, she had to wake me up. ppl cant even let me sleep in peace. haiz. juz because i din msg u, u make a big fuss over it. haiz, i don't know what to say. it's bad enough that i couldn't meet u. ~fcking blah mood~ |
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Friday, November 9, 2007, 8:18 PM
2 more days to flee away from the four walls.
i cant seem to sit still in one place for more than a minute. reason: boredom. my mum says i am such an 'annoying creature' when i am on holidays. how can u blame me? there's nothing to entertain me.. :x therefore, i irritate my brothers for a lil entertainment.. how fun eh!!??! like finally after so long, i'm meeting naren tmr. i'm getting too excited over meeting him. haven really decided wad we gonna do. but I DUN WANT TO WATCH A TAMIL MOVIE.. but he aint listenin to me!! such an ass. a sweet loving one though. my lappie decided to malfunction yesterday nite. i guess it sent me a warning signal:'it's time to reformat me'. i almost had a cardiac arrest. but somehow today i managed to do something about it. hopefully it works on monday. ~ haruna's gonna die soon due to boredom. someone pls save her ~ |
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Thursday, November 8, 2007, 6:29 PM
~happy deepavali to all my loved ones~
it's deepavali today. && it feels like any other normal day. no sentiments, i am enjoying this day rotting in front of the tv. i simply love it. hehehe. i enjoyed checkin out the indian guys on yesterday's deepavali show wid nesha. totally fun. msn-in each other commenting on each an every aspect of the hotties. seeing indian guys in jipa(indian traditional clothes for guys) gives me a major turn on. instantly, i get goosebumps. :D another 3 days to sch. damn, i hate this feeling when i miss sch. how is it possible tad i miss sch? but seriously, i am yearning to go back to sch. |
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Wednesday, November 7, 2007, 3:13 PM
it's over. i hope u soul will rest in peace.
till now i can't accept the fact tad u're gone. it's not fair tad u have to give up ur life in this way. but now tad everything is over. and we can't do anything about it. i'll pray for u to rest in peace. && pray tad those three bastards will be sent to the gallows. as for people ard. they will continue yaking away. it's of no use rite now. let go of it, guys. i miss my friends. i need to get back to sch to get things of ma mind. i need to get endless hugs from ma sweeties. i miss ma teddybear too. && i have to be vegetarian for the next 16 days. i guess i have to survive on bread. :D time to lose weight!! |
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Saturday, November 3, 2007, 11:46 AM
situations aren't getting any better. i realize.
the informations are overflowing from all corners. which do we believe and which do we not? but all those are secondary issues, u getting back on ur feet is primary. we do have the confidence that u'll come back. yesterday, the talk wid ma cupcake. was awesome. so many things we shared. thaNks girl. being wid you makes me feel a whole lot better. ~damn. cramps!~ |
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Friday, November 2, 2007, 2:38 PM
the mood is so blah.
i just wanna see u. ur smile. i need ur hug. ur pecks. being ard u lightens the mood. i understand ur reasons. but u dun seem to understand mine. i miss u. |
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, 11:35 AM
yipee!! i am happy.
and the reason: "aint telling u!" life's unpredictable; dun regret wad u do today. wad u have done in the past doesnt matter. now u're fighting for ur life. y is everyone talking about ur past? it's simply stupidity. pls battle and come back. i'm praying for u. |