i've been having very bad mind-blocks lately.
every time i try to post an entry, my mind goes blank.
can't be blamed.
school's out and massive rotting/stoning moments are kicking in.
so it simply indicates that i should must find a job.
before i become senile/couch potato/etc. (feel free to fill in the blanks)
you know, just that part, when you're supposed to do up the resume.
yeap, it takes too much of effort when you can't really figure out what you need to put in there.
and plain laziness.
not to mention, a job is required for a continuous flow of income and the fact that i'm penniless right now.
just one tree producing $10 bills?

&& i won't deny that as much as i love being at home all the time, i miss all my friends.
i miss rosey. i miss shakthee. i miss nessa. i miss chun sang.
i miss arieyanto. i miss valli. i miss veena.
and i miss everyone else that i see daily in school.

tuesday.
met fazli and erica after an extremely long time.
endless of gossips and laughter at pizza hut.
i realised when it's the three of us, one way or another, we end up at pizza hut.
after a late lunch, we caught the movie 'INKHEART'.
i liked the show, somewhat interesting i should say.
i feel the need to read the book, just to figure out if the storyline of the book relates to the storyline of the movie.
and in the cinema there was a couple sitting right behind us and they were laughing at the slightest things. and the lady's laughter was horrendous yet hilarious.
erica and i couldn't stop joining in together with her laughter.
then fazli and i thought they should have named the movie 'SILVER TONGUE'.
it would have been more appropriate.
after the movie, as planned we made our way for dinner at a hawker center.
cause i was craving for bbq stingray.
unfortunately, due to the public holiday, most of the shops were close.
we should have guessed it though.
we made our way to sempang bedok, it was my first time there.
and we had our delicious seafood dinner =)


and as usual, tomorrow will be another day spent unfruitfully at home.



see there's this place in me where your fingerprints still rest,
your kisses still linger, and your whispers softly echo.
it's the place where a part of you will forever be a part of me.

following the traditions of the family.
we went out for family dinner since it's daddy's birthday.
the usual north indian restaurant at holiday inn hotel.
truckloads of laughter which we don't usually get at home, cause we're all busy with our own stuff.
before my brother retorts (when he sees this). i hide myself in the comforts of my room, stoning around doing nothing. therefore, not much bonding sessions :P
it's either i'm getting older or my dad's being loonier around me. =D
spilling vulgarities in front of his children while getting excited.
in all. dinner, family time, trip to and fro, it was all perfect. ((:
i HEART my family!!


Happy Birthday, Kalaivani! =)

a simple day spent at home, helping out in the chores.
which most of them, i managed to do without bothering my mum.
i see myself improving in those housework.
and no, that doesn't mean you can hire me as a maid.

&& i cooked chicken curry for dinner =)
and it was delicious. quoted by my family members!!
see.. i'm learning :P

thursday. the last of RP.
that's if i'm not going back there for the next semester.
class will never be boring when you're in the same team as your best friends.
shakthee. rosey. chun sang.
little notes. chocolates. class photos. games. laughter.
it won't be the same when we're all moving on the next phase of life.

while waiting for titus to meet us after school, shakthee and i went to meet prem.
shakthee and i got abused terribly.
i returned home with a huge bruise on my right arm.
mummy thought i got punched.
and it's still blue black and hurts alot. =(

friday.
it was ultimately crazy!! (:
3 couples + my pooh bear Rosey!!
shakthee and titus, me and boyfriend, praveena and raj.
rosey did the honor of cooking for us. it was edible and nice. =P
not forgetting the alcohol. when there's all of us, the alcohol's there too.
the girlfriends were manhandled and abused terribly by the boyfriends while rosey was stuck in the middle not knowing how to help us.
after the mini wrestling showdown, i waxed boyfriend's arm while rosey got her leg waxed.
it was part of the dare. major failure in trying to wax raj's and titus's leg.
there'll always be another time :P
private sessions was love. (:


now that school's over.
it's time to hunt for a job.
it doesn't help when all my money's gone.
and the thought of going abroad for studies.



time to time, the unwanted surprises you give me.
it builds the insecurity in me.
then when i sit back and think, all that matters is your love for me.
it don't matter, the things to you say or do.
cause, till the end, i'm going to be crazy over you.
just like since day one, the only reason being.
i can never get enough of you.

sometimes, it'll be so much better if i had a whole lot more of patience.
sadly, i got the genes from my dad so i don't see it working.


all those lingering thoughts, it kills silently and slowly.

there's officially three more days of school left!!
three years in RP and who ever realized that time flies this fast.
it seems just like yesterday.
and there's definitely a tinge of sadness there.
to think that everyone's going on on their own path of life.
the chance of seeing one another, it's much lesser.
thankfully, singapore's small. someday, we're all going to bump into one another.
and when i see shamini.. i'll definitely shout her name across the street and sing her that special song. =P

there wasn't any class today, so it was just lazing around at home.
helping out with the chores. nothing else which deserves attention.
ouh!! i bought myself three tops from my friend's blog shop. =)

thursday.
one of the days where you get to see haruna hyped out throughout the whole day.
was contemplating to get up from bed in the morning for school.
then there was an random call from boyfriend at 6.30am.
my brain couldn't register anything that he was saying over the phone except the line that he was picking me up. we picked up rosey.
rosey had so much of difficulties getting into the car cause the back was filled with boxes of food and other stuff (for his friend's birthday party).
we managed to squeeze shakthee in at woodlands. first time in the last semester of school, we reached early!! haha!

class was so fun. the three of us were in the same group.
and none of us could stop laughing throughout the lesson.
still we did a very good job for the presentation. =)
siva came back to RP with praveena this time. we had lunch at causeway point.
it's been long since i laughed till i teared. rosey and her jokes.
now rosey has a laughing companion, sivashankar!
after lunch, we chilled at a multistorey carpark.

car model (part one)


part 2. i'm speechless. =P


i think it's the car fetish. =P


the three people i don't want to live without.


then back to school while praveena and siva went to pick up raj.
we lazed around in the canteen awhile before dispersing.
sent shakthee off to sembawang to meet titus, then boyfriend dropped me home!
to think that the whole day, he was with us. (:
i can't express how happy i felt.

tomorrow's sumathi's 21st birthday party. =)



i find myself falling in love with you deeper each time.
my love for you knows no boundaries.
i love you, love. (:

dad instructed me to go to bed early so that i'll be able to get up in the morning to help out with the house chores tomorrow.
considering that tomorrow, actually today. it's pongal, an auspicious day for the hindus.
and i'm still awake cause i can't sleep although i'm feeling a little tired and woozy.

i attended this resume writing workshop in school earlier today.
i won't deny the fact that it looks easy and simple to write but there's so much to it.
i forgot half the achievements i have made, if there's any.
it's time to start penning down the resume.
did i mention, i'm looking for tuition too. just an extra income to help myself.

after the workshop, shakthee and i met titus who came after camp.
shakthee and i got our boyfriends' the same perfume from the body shop.
i still got the smell of the perfume lingering in my wrist and it's intoxicating.
can't wait to smell it on boyfriend. =P
i'm praying that his interview with the body shop would be a success later on. (:



I love you today; I’ll love you tomorrow; I’ll love you forever.
& you're all that i'm ever going to need.

i should be in bed right now, firstly cause i'm dead tired.
secondly, then only can i wake up in time for school tomorrow.

rosey and i didn't make it to school successfully today.
thanks to me and the temptations rosey gave in to.
morning breakfast with her at MacDonalds and a heart to heart talk. (:
i tried resisting the urge of calling boyfriend to meet cause i thought he would say his usual no.
it was probably my lucky day and he probably got up on the right side of the bed.
we planned to meet. not forgetting how he shouted on the phone before that, and how i deserve a slap from him for skipping school. :(

made my way to redhill. meeting at 12 became 12.30.
then we went to catch a tamil movie (silambattam) with shalini and her two friends (whose names i can't remember now)
the movie was pretty screwed up.
we went to vivocity in hope to catch another movie after that, sadly there wasn't anything to watch. (it was all for good in the end) =P
had early dinner at Pizza Hut where conversations took a new level.
boyfriend gets shy easily and it's amusingly cute :p


there's exactly 5 more schooling days.
and done. =)



i want to be in your arms, where you hold me tight and never let me go.

practically after 7 weeks of missing today's lesson, i was back in class.
but not for long, before rosey came tempting us on msn to leave class halfway.

before lunch, there was a photoshoot for the graduation book.
then nessa, cs, rosey, shakthee and myself went to a nearby block to chill.
we tried stuffing mushmellows in our mouths while saying chubby bunnies.
i couldn't go beyond four mushmellows. small mouth =P

along the way, where details shall be excluded.
rosey, shakthee and i had pizza for lunch.
and while rosey made her way back to school, shakthee and i went to orchard to get my brother's phone repaired.
it was a failure though, i didn't send the phone for a repair. it cost about $150. tsk, sooooo expensive.
then we went to cotton on to buy cardigans for ourselves.
the temptation to shop was rather high, but i resisted. so proud of myself, you know!!
the charles and keith at Wisma has extremely nice collections. *hints*

then we went for threading. where the lady scarred my eyebrows again.
made our way to bugis to find my handsome boyfriend and his friends.
stayed around awhile before parting on our own ways.

and tomorrow might be a long day.
thanks to all the chores and errands.




cause i love you and i miss you, hearing your voice is the closest thing to touching you…
i love you, sweetheart.

pharm.chem for lesson today.
the test killed me yesterday. the lesson bored me to death today.
at the end of the day, it's like you're destined to die for pharm.chem.
there was a legislation test too.
it was pretty manageable.

the train was jam-packed on the way back home.
was sandwiched in between all those inconsiderate people.
and there were this two indian guys who tried to be funny.
one of them kept brushing against my hands and chest.
like seriously WTF. luckily, rosey was there to save me. =)

i broke the news to my mum.
of how i might not make it out of poly this semester and the need to repeat one module.
she has yet to say anything. i do see it coming though.



you're nothing short of my everything.

the day just isn't right today.
although class was perfectly fine, and i was productive in class.
pharm.chem test killed me. literally.
an instant cardiac arrest would have been a better alternative compared to doing the test.
5 mins after the test began, i started panicking so badly that i couldn't even type properly.
and i only managed to finish 2 and a half questions out of seven.
so, it can clearly be seen. a big F for the test and a big E for the module.
resulting in one more semester, i think.
i just hope not. i'm so excited about leaving RP.

8 lessons. 8 days. and done!

earlier on, i started filling up the application form for NIE.
i decided NIE would be a good choice if i can't do a degree.
you get paid while studying with year end bonus.
yeap, i can hear many of you saying. the pay is low.
i will work my way up the salary scale. (:

also, i'm elated over the FYP grade.
B+ (: this would help the gpa. i think.

boyfriend said no more clubbing. ):


lostandbothered.
feels like slapping herself.

saturday was an eventful day.
nessa's little gathering was a success. =)
pizza and chicken wings for dinner while watching Hairspray.
waxing and plucking nasri's and c.s's leg hair. and their classic reactions.
it was so hilarious. video will be up soon :P
then we watched a chinese movie where the heroine refused to die.
gave nasri a little manicure session too. that boy is vain!!

shakthee made sudden plans to go clubbing.
and she gave her pathetic look persuading me to come.
so, me being a kind soul. i took the risk and begged my dad.
daddy allowed me to stay out the night (presuming that i was at nessa's place.)
around 1130, shakthee's boyfriend, titus came to pick us up.
we made our way to boat quay and waited there for almost 45mins.
titus kept saying that his friends would be there in 10 mins.
a total of 3 ten minutes and they still weren't there.
finally we entered chillies. free entry + free flow for ladies. (:

after a few jugs and glasses of alcohol. and toooo much of dancing in heels.
i got extremely high. i still deny the fact that i was drunk.
despite i showed all the symptoms of being drunk.
i feel guilty for spoiling the night for shakthee and titus.
and i also feel guilty for spoiling boyfriend's sleep.
i staggered my way to redhill to meet him at 7 in the morning.
followed him for mac'donald's breakfast, then to subway.
stoned at his workplace till 10plus then made my way home.

slept throughout the afternoon, and am still in need of the sleep.
that crappy feeling lingering around is so sucky!
&& my parents know that i'm suffering from a hung-over.

back to school tomorrow.
and there's a pharm.chem test on the first day itself.
i haven't studied due to the massive stoning process.
hopefully, will be able to study in class tomorrow.
there's only three more weeks of school. =D
time flies.



babyboy, i love you.

haruna's a grumpy girl today.
and she vented her anger by throwing things around the house.

it feels like i overreacted.
then again, the girl has her needs.
and she needs to be desired.

i'm no longer frustrated.
i feel perfectly fine already.

earlier on, i sent my youngest brother to school.
the school which i used to attend.
as i walked back home from the school, it was like reliving the moments.
reflecting those times in that environment.
brings back laughter and a tinge of sorrow.

he's all ready for secondary school (:



can't wait to see all the loved souls tomorrow.
i miss them.



boyfriend, boyfriend.
despite all the anger, the harsh words i throw at you.
i still love you. (:

Happy New Year!


for the record, on the first day of the year.
i cooked (: and yes, it was fit for human consumption!

ROSEY'S BACK!
yay yay!
i can't wait to grab onto her tudung and give her a bear hug!

both my brothers are going back to school tomorrow.
it's back to square one.


imissboyfriend.